Comments on: don’t censor emotions

By: Doug McCaughan

Doug McCaughan — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 13:30:21 +0000

We don’t want them putting on airs in their writing. We want them to write their feelings with feeling. Now I’m not encouraging them to say “My birthday sucked” (but she did have a rough week) but that’s how she was feeling I want her to feel free to let it out. Now if she’s standing in front of her grandparents and says “sucks” she’s gonna getting a talkin’! I fully accept that children will use language around peers that we don’t want them using. One of my son’s friends was playing the wii and exclaimed “son of a b..” glances at my stern look “..uh..gun” to which I responded “Good catch. Almost made a bad mistake didn’t you?” Certainly my son has tried them on. My only hope is that the words don’t wear well and that they choose to add them to their vernacular.

Our children are often corrected on word choice in proper settings.

By: Barry

Barry — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 06:11:22 +0000

I don’t agree with one aspect of this (and suspect we’ll always be at odds about it) but if there are words you don’t think teens or pre-teens should be using then stand by your guns and tell them not to use them. If there’s something you think they should not be doing, then don’t allow them to do it in the name of “personal freedom” or the guise that it will hamper their thoughts or emotions. You’re not causing them to deny their feelings, you’re – as a responsible parents – steering them in the direction they need to be steered that will help them become honorable and respectable adults. And it really doesn’t apply to just words – it’s anything. If there’s something they’re doing that’s wrong, it’s our job to help them. Sure, let them make their own mistakes and all that – obviously let them learn from their screwups – but don’t pretend the wrong paths are ok or don’t matter just because you value the concept of personal expression so much. They’re perfectly capable of expressing their feelings and thoughts in a matter that doesn’t include crude language or hurtful words. It can be done, and sometimes limiting that “easy” language can make them better speakers and writers.

By: Eric

Eric — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 02:42:04 +0000

… indeed…. and blogging is a much easier window……

By: Kris

Kris — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 23:47:02 +0000

It used to make me sick even on a preK level when everyone *had* to be your friend. Sure we didn’t want kids excluded because “I don’t like them,” but it builds who we are. And I don’t want my children thinking everyone in life is honest and their friend. Even at four years old my kids, for the most part, could tell who was fake. And now, at (almost) 8 and 11 years old, they know the fake “Humor them” smile.

If they’ve had a cruddy day, they’ll say just that, and get a hug in the end. And if they need to scream and yell, they have a place to do that, too. You are who you are. And you are your choices – good or bad. Own them. Create yourself the way you want to be defined. But don’t fakey fake. Bleugh.