Cynical Dad is talking about parents who deliberately hold their child back from Kindergarten. As it has been explained to him, parents do it because their child is not mature enough for school and starting later will allow them to be more mature and prepared. Several of his commenters state the obvious notion that it is often the parents who are not ready. I had a mother explain it to me differently. She held her child back for a year so that her child would be more emotionally mature, physically more developed and able to be at the top of the class instead of just an average student. Since I know another family that deliberately moved to a school with very low achieving students so that their very average daughter would look superior academically, I am nonplussed to this manipulative parenting. Personally, I am still burnt by Noah’s kindergarten teacher asking that Noah repeat kindergarten after forcing him to use his right hand for half of the year, because “children from underprivileged homes do better if they are held back.” I refused to allow it and Noah has gotten grief at the school ever since. Add to that Tommy’s kindergarten teacher telling me that she’s just a babysitter for kids who don’t belong in school and I have a completely jaded disbelief in the entire public school system. However, since Amy has already told me twice today that she knows everything, she WILL be starting kindergarten next fall.

Most serious conversations happen at night when Doug and I are the only people listening. Last Saturday, one of the conversations leaked over to the grandparents’ house and my parents added their two cents. Since my father has some hearing loss that he refuses to acknowledge, everyone in the family knows that mumbles and whispers go unheard.

My father: “I know that ALL of my children will want to keep my ashes.”
Me: “No way. I will sneak you into Neyland Stadium and dump you there.”
My father: “Why? It’s Astroturf.”
My mother mumbling in the other room: “If you die first I’m putting you in Cades Cove. You never took me there when you were alive so I’m putting you there for eternity.”

Our dryer is E-VIL!

Hooray! Now he’ll just do big pharma’s bidding from the Tennessee White House.

no clothes or diaper
keeps unbuckling his car seat
need stronger duct tape

For the first time in about 7 years, Tommy has gotten himself suspended from school. I loathe suspensions. A day at home is not a punishment. The punishment should fit the crime whenever possible and if not, there should be consequences at school. I am also uncomfortable with the situation as it is being described compared to what Tommy told me. This is one of those things that can’t and shouldn’t be fought though. Just try to make the day at home a school day and talk, talk, talk about what he can do to prevent this in the future. I expect Noah to bring home a note from school so that today’s trifecta of bad parenting can be complete.

Tommy’s version

Update: Noah’s addition to the day. “Hey Mom, somebody came in our class today and checked everybody’s hair for lice.”

Sarah stayed home sick today, but don’t tell my mother. My mother’s iron-clad rule was “no fever, no staying home”. Sarah has no fever. In fact, she doesn’t have much in the way of sickness. She has a slight cough and is a little hoarse. She does, however, have the personality of a wet boar. Extreme surliness combined with her napping after school yesterday is just uncharacteristic for her, no matter what Doug says about her personality. Since I almost never run a fever and my norm is less than 98.6, I always hated my mother’s fever rule. This may be more of a mental health day than a sick day, but she needs some time to rest. I’m the mom and I get to make the rules up as I go.

Molly’s pathology report came in today. Benign.

I don’t want to eat any more Thanksgiving leftovers. Four days is two too many.

Put tree up - Done!
Lights on tree - Done!
Ornaments on tree - All on one side of tree with an obvious line at Amy’s eye level.
Lights outside house - Done!
Other decor up - Done!
Cards ordered - not even begun
Cards addressed - not even begun
Cards mailed - not even begun
Visit Santa - Done!
Crafted gifts made - just beginning
Gifts bought - not even begun
Gifts wrapped - not even begun
House scrubbed - not even begun, not gonna happen
Pantry stocked - not even begun, not possible with 5 children
Panic and anxiety - Absolutely!

Oh, for anyone keeping track, the cabinet door that fell is still down. Doug is in the basement doing something that sounds like demolition. When he makes those noises, I stay upstairs. It’s Cathy repellent noise.

Broken glass ornament count - 1 2 3 4 so far