Tawdry quirk curators
// February 8th, 2012 // No Comments » // kid quotes, marriage
Doug: “Do you want to go out for Valentine’s Day? You know, like an actual date?”
Me: “I don’t know. I hadn’t really thought about it.”
Noah: “That’s good because, Dad and I scheduled a Boy Scout meeting for that night.”
// January 13th, 2012 // 1 Comment » // home, kid quotes
“We are never moving to Texas or anywhere. I never want to leave our house.”
Prior to this week’s construction, Evan would periodically claim that our house is “too broken.” It was. In the winter, you could stand outside and watch the heat escaping the house. Inside the house, there was a noticeable breeze from the cracked and broken windows. One window flapped open and shut every time the front door opened or closed. Duct tape covered the cracks and gaping holes. It was atrocious.
In the grand scheme of everything that is broken in our 1940s house that is bursting at the seams with twice the number of people and far more “stuff” than it was designed to hold, new roof, siding, and windows might seem like they are only the exterior repairs. They are proving to be so much more than superficial. It is repairing something deep inside of us that we didn’t know was broken.
I can’t fathom what Evan would say if we painted and repaired the Lego storage and assembly area aka Evan’s room.
// January 6th, 2012 // 2 Comments » // kid quotes, parenting
“When I grow up, I’m gonna be a cool dude rapper with lots of girls liking me.”
Since he was a toddler, the child who is so pale he gets a sunburn while fully clothed has pointed at male teens and twenty-somethings with dark skin and loudly declared them to be cool dudes. I never corrected him. Teenagers and young adults ARE cool.
I don’t know when he decided he is going to BE black. I do know that my efforts to explain to him that skin color isn’t a choice were met with complete disbelief.
I think my children conspire to come up with ways to perplex me.
// November 12th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes, parenting
Me: “Today is Carl Sagan Day.”
Noah: “Who?”
Me: “Oh, Noah. Get out your iPad and accurately describe Carl Sagan in 140 characters.”
Noah: “Seriously?”
Me: “Completely serious. Didn’t you ever wonder why your dad and I like to say bill-i-ons and bill-i-ons?”
Noah: “No. You guys say LOTS of weird stuff.”
You know that mixed feeling of excitement and disappointment that comes with realizing you can no longer spell words out to keep surprises a secret from your small children? Apparently, it doesn’t matter, because nothing you say makes sense to your teenagers.
Carl Sagan by Noah
*Carl Sagan is
Kinda sorta a little
Uninteresting.
Astronomer who
Wrote many cool articles
About science stuff.
* We spent a ridiculous amount of time discussing the number of syllables in Carl.
// October 12th, 2011 // 1 Comment » // kid quotes, parenting
“Why is mommy’s phone in the fridge?”
“So Amy can’t find it.”
“No fair! You got to bury the dead bird, so I should get to bury the mole.”
“Why aren’t you wearing underpants?”
“They take too long to put on.”
“What happened to your library book?”
“Somebody ate it.”
“Don’t make me sell you to the gypsies.”
“Yaaay! I love the gypsies.”
“After T and N remove the porch, Amy and Evan can take turns burying whatever corpses the cat was keeping under the porch.”
“Hooray!”
6:30 a.m. Monday – Friday “It’s too early to get up.”
5 a.m. Saturday “What’s for breakfast?”
I certainly am glad that I refused to even take Tylenol when I was pregnant with these guys. It really made a difference.
// October 5th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes, parenting
Me: “What did I just say to you?”
Evan: “Stop running. Blah-blah. Quit throwing stuff. Blah-blah. Sit down.”
Me: “Thank you for listening. Now, sit down.”
// August 22nd, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes
Amy: “My teacher says that soap gets the germs off your hands, but antibacterial stuff kills them and leaves them there.”
Sarah: “So, if you don’t use soap, you have zombie germs on your hands.”
// August 16th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes
“If I go to your bed now, I won’t have to walk downstairs in the middle of the night to crawl between you and daddy.”
// August 15th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes
Noah: “I talked to the Mayor on Friday and today I met the Superintendent.”
Me: “How did you meet the Super?”
Noah: “Well, I didn’t know you pull the cord to make the trolley stop, so, I missed my bus stop and got to school late. When I went in the office, the Principal was talking to someone. The Superintendent came over to help me.”
Me: “What did you talk about?”
Noah: “I told him I was late because I missed my stop and had to walk.”
Me: “What did he say?”
Noah: “Bummer.”
// August 8th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes
“Please blow your nose Evan.”
“I don’t have any boogers. I only have webs.”
“Blow out the webs before a spider crawls in your nose.”
“I want spiders in my nose! Then, I can shoot webs at people. Pew-pew-pew!”
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