Domestic Psychology | Archive

On Friday, we . . .

// November 3rd, 2010 // No Comments » // flickr, travel

On Thursday, we . . .

// November 1st, 2010 // No Comments » // flickr, travel

. . . went on an airplane.

he vs she

// October 12th, 2010 // No Comments » // teenagers, travel

Boy teen and girl teen are going on Fall Break outings. Boy teen is making the ever popular ‘marching band goes to Disney World’ trip from Wednesday until Sunday. Girl teen is going to middle TN with a friend to tour a college, roam Nashville with other teens and experience the joy/pain of Portfolio Day. She will be gone from Thursday night until Sunday.

Girl teen is taking a duffle bag bigger than herself. She is also taking a canvas shoulder tote, a frog pillow and a large portfolio held together with duct tape, dental floss and chewing gum. Well, maybe not the floss and gum. Boy teen is taking the bag I use for overnights. Girl teen will return home having worn all 11 outfits that she packed. Boy teen will return wearing the clothes he left home in and carrying his tiny overnight bag full of clean clothes.

Neither teen will call or text home enough to ease my worries while they are gone. Both teens will have wonderful adventures during their Fall Break.

leaving on a jet plane

// September 25th, 2010 // No Comments » // Doug, parenting, travel

In a month, we are taking the youngest children on a mini-adventure. The part of the adventure they can’t stop talking about is their first ride in an airplane. As with all things that involve children, there is much behind the scenes planning involved. I’m not an experienced flier, but I think I have the airplane part of the trip mentally organized.

I want to arrive at the airport early enough to let the children watch other people go through security and answer any questions they have before we get in the security line. I’ll dress the children and I in slip-on shoes. I might wear a wireless bra even if it means risking my boobs falling on the ground and getting lost in the airport. The children and I will empty our pockets into the luggage that we are checking and there will be no teeny-tiny toys, toys that roll when dropped or toys without volume control allowed. Everyone will visit the potty just before we enter the security area. Going through security, one parent will be at each end and the children will remain between us.

Doug is planning too. He wants to wear cargo pants and a SeV so that he can carry the Kindle, iPhone, DSi, extra batteries, power cords, tripod, juggling balls, sunglasses, tickets, fidget toys and everything that he usually carries in his manbag (It’s a purse). That will leave his hands free to carry children in crowds.

After pondering Doug’s plan, I have decided that I will be at the front of our family parade and Doug will be the caboose. He can catch a later flight when he finally makes it through security.

my car is magic

// September 22nd, 2010 // 1 Comment » // life, travel

I drive children all over town. This school, that school, scouts, meetings and activities are the dots that I connect day after day. With all that driving, you would think that the gas station is a regular stop on my routes, but it isn’t. My car is magic. It never needs gasoline. Every few days, the gas tank in my car is magically full again. I think it happens at night. I guess the car could be autogenic and generating its’ own fuel. It’s possible that there is another explanation for my bottomless gas tank. Maybe the shoemaker’s elves have branched out into fuel delivery. Perhaps unicorns, leprechauns or mogwai are responsible for keeping my car’s fuel tank full. Regardless of how it happens, the magic never fails to make my day a little easier. Thank you magic car.

humidity chronicles – part two

// May 21st, 2010 // 1 Comment » // kid quotes, preschoolers, travel

When Amy is sick, she is pitifully sad. Her eyes get round like a Keane painting and they are filled with a sea of tears that quietly roll down her pale, white cheeks. Except for the occasional whimper, she is silent. Amy was in sick mode the entire ride home from Natchez Trace.

On the contrary, Evan was completely annoyed to spend five plus hours in the car for the second day in a row. Apparently, he planned to spend several days wreaking havoc in the hotel with his cousins. He had running, shouting, climbing and general silliness to do. He was in no mood to be harnessed in the car. After we had run out of ways to entertain him and he had run out of excuses and schemes to get out of the car, he took things into his own capable hands. “I’m getting out of this seat.”

Before I could spin my head to respond to his announcement, he was completely out of his seat belts. I scrambled to get myself unbuckled so that I could awkwardly climb in the back and capture the escapee while Doug pulled the car to an abrupt stop. So abrupt that Evan smacked the back of the driver’s seat and flopped to the floor. As Evan sat up with an annoyed scowl, Amy’s tiny voice broke the stunned silence. “Shoulda stayed in your seat like you’re supposed to.”

good idea at the time

// December 11th, 2009 // No Comments » // holidays, travel

After seeing the umpteenth car with reindeer antlers, I suggested that we Griswald our van with an old, ratty, artificial tree. What Doug heard me say, was “Decorate the car for the crazy wife.” What he should have heard, was “Let’s weigh down the mileage on the car with bald tires and broken tie rods.” A three dollar yard sale tree was quickly found and attached to the top of the van.

The first problem was the unexpected monsoon winds that wreaked havoc for 2 days in Knoxville. Trees down, power outages and reports of holiday decorations flying through the air should have been a warning that the tree was a bad idea. Instead, we realized there was a problem when a 40 mph gust hit the van while it was flying down the Interstate. If driving the van that day was anything like navigating a sailboat in an ocean storm, I think I’ll stay on land. I apologize to all the other drivers on the road who couldn’t understand why I was driving so slow on one of Knoxville’s raceways. If I had gone the usual speed, you would have had a tree on your windshield or I would have been in a floating car. Neither would have ended well.

The second problem was that I am not very bright. The proof of this is that while taking Amy to an eye doctor appointment, I haplessly pulled into a parking garage. Immediately, I wondered what was causing the strange noise. As quickly as I asked myself the source of the noise, I realized that everyone else in the garage was staring at me. I was making the noise. Well, not me personally, but the tree on top of the van that was dragging on every single support beam. It was too late to escape the garage, so I parked as quickly as I could and checked the tree for damage. None. That u-g-l-y tree was still firmly attached to the car.

Although I am now hyper sensitive to the weather, car’s speed and overhead clearance, I do enjoy not having to make a mental note of my chosen parking space. That tree on top of the van is more effective than any antennae topper.

Northshore

// August 26th, 2009 // 6 Comments » // child welfare, school, travel

This picture was taken three years ago, on Northshore. This is what Northshore looks like on winter mornings around the same time that the elementary bus arrives. It is a dark, dangerous road that has a roadside memorial every few yards. Some of those memorials are recent enough that it is still painful to see them. The traffic is heavy and the drivers exceed the speed limit. Driving home from a meeting one night, I witnessed an act of road rage on Northshore. A car deliberately rear-ended the car in front of them and then they dashed around their victim and sped away. The car that had been bumped, took off in hot pursuit. It was an ugly thing to watch and although I reported the incident to the police, I did not “follow them” as the 911 operator suggested.

Despite the nearby businesses that my older children love to frequent, I don’t allow my teenagers to walk on Northshore. It is just too dangerous. I don’t walk on Northshore. I would call the man around the block who runs a taxi service before I would venture out on Northshore on foot. Why would Knox County Schools think it is acceptable for elementary age children to stand on one of Knoxville’s most dangerous roads? How can they possibly justify putting children in harm’s way on a bus route that begins at 7:10 and ends at 7:13, with the excuse that they don’t have time to add three minutes to their route? This is unacceptable. Knox County Schools need to do the right thing and move the bus stop back to where children have been safely waiting for the past few years.

Update: Knox County Schools has returned the spot to its’ much safer location. Thank you!