Domestic Psychology

duct tape is not a foundation garment

// September 24th, 2008 // 1 Comment » // clothing, parenting, school

Sarah’s color guard costume last year had some problems. First, the teacher didn’t want any clear bra straps or underwear lines, so the girls went extreme commando. Then, the teacher complained about noticing when the girls were cold. The improvised solution was a band of duct tape acting as a strapless bra. Parents were less than pleased. The color guard girls come in all sizes and some of the girls were just too jiggly and unsupported. This year’s solution was a unitard under the costumes. The girls look better and the parents are happier. Win-Win.

Homecoming is this weekend and Sarah picked out a cute, but backless dress. Her solution? Duct tape. I can’t believe I complained until I got to go bra shopping with a 15-year-old. It only took 2 hours of trying them on, but she found a solution that is NOT a flower shaped pasty. I thought strippers had to special order that stuff, but there it sits in the regular people store. Sarah is now very excited about her outfit for homecoming. Want to see it? She’s going to be wearing it for the cocktail party at BlogHer. I’ll be wearing duct tape.

Friday Night Fun

// September 19th, 2008 // No Comments » // flickr

How I ruined Color Guard

// September 11th, 2008 // 10 Comments » // me, parenting, school

Have you seen this? According to my 15-year-old, I’m an all-powerful, evil villain who is personally responsible for all the woes of Bearden High School’s Color Guard. Students in Color Guard get a credit on their high school transcript. Since they are on block schedule, the class is about 25% of their regular school day. I have this silly idea that regular school hours are for learning and the absence of a teacher or ANY adult supervision during that time is neglect on the school’s part. I’m old fashioned that way. So, after several weeks of waiting for the school to find someone to supervise the Color Guard during school hours, Sarah came home with blood on her face and shirt. The injury was harmless and one of those freaky things that only happen to our family, but I wasn’t going to wait for something serious to happen. I sent the new principal an e-mail.

The principal replied within minutes from his handy-dandy BlackBerry. “I understand your concern. I will remedy the problem.” Awesome. I waited a few days to hear a reaction from Sarah. Finally, I asked if anything was different during 4th period. Sarah’s eyes rolled back in her head as it spun around in slow motion. Laser beams shot out of her eyes and fire came out of her mouth as she spoke. “The teacher is really mad. She said that someone’s parent called the school to complain. Now we have a babysitter. I know it was you who complained.” I processed the lava that my teen spat upon me. The teacher blamed the students and pitted them against each other because I sent one e-mail. I offered to call and talk to the teacher. Sarah‘s head exploded. I told her I would back off. For now.

So, the Color Guard are now eating their own and half of them can’t learn the routine, because of me. I want to try and fix this problem of my own making. Maybe if I send an e-mail . . .