Domestic Psychology

not a vampire

// June 16th, 2012 // 1 Comment » // children, kid quotes

Evan: “How old were you when you ate chocolate covered ants for the first time?”
Me: “I have never eaten chocolate covered ants.”
Evan: “I was thinking about chocolate covered ants. When they kill the ants, the ants get all bloody. Then, they put chocolate on top of bloody ants. So really, you are eating chocolate covered ants AND ant blood.”
Me: “I never actually thought about how chocolate covered ants are made.”
Evan: “They trick you into eating ant blood. That’s gross.”
Me: “It does sound gross.”
Evan: “I don’t want to eat ant blood. Ever.”
Me: “I will never ask you to eat ant blood.”
Evan: “I love you Mommy.”

Evanism

// April 9th, 2012 // No Comments » // humor, kid quotes

Evan: “I love you so much I had to write your name.”
Me: “Thank you. I love you, too. Can I see your writing?”
Evan: “Sure. It’s in the bathroom. I wrote it on the counter, but I used your toothpaste cause you don’t like it when I waste mine.”

My time is his time

// April 3rd, 2012 // No Comments » // humor, kid quotes

Me: “We will leave as soon as I go potty.”
Evan: “Okay, but only go pee. Poop takes too long.”

May as well have said “fire truck”

// January 6th, 2012 // 2 Comments » // kid quotes, parenting

“When I grow up, I’m gonna be a cool dude rapper with lots of girls liking me.”

Since he was a toddler, the child who is so pale he gets a sunburn while fully clothed has pointed at male teens and twenty-somethings with dark skin and loudly declared them to be cool dudes. I never corrected him. Teenagers and young adults ARE cool.

I don’t know when he decided he is going to BE black. I do know that my efforts to explain to him that skin color isn’t a choice were met with complete disbelief.

I think my children conspire to come up with ways to perplex me.

Just keep swinging.

// January 1st, 2012 // No Comments » // children, flickr

How to: play with leaves

// November 25th, 2011 // No Comments » // fall, flickr

Evan says:

// August 16th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes

“If I go to your bed now, I won’t have to walk downstairs in the middle of the night to crawl between you and daddy.”

Tingly booger sense

// August 8th, 2011 // No Comments » // kid quotes

“Please blow your nose Evan.”
“I don’t have any boogers. I only have webs.”
“Blow out the webs before a spider crawls in your nose.”
“I want spiders in my nose! Then, I can shoot webs at people. Pew-pew-pew!”

being literal

// August 7th, 2011 // No Comments » // food, kid quotes

“Evan! What are you doing?”
“Spitting out my watermelon seeds.”
“Why are you spitting them on the living room floor?”
“Dad told me not to swallow them.”

Dancing Evan

// June 26th, 2011 // 1 Comment » // children, flickr