Month: August 2009

back to school

Tommy: “I own a pair of jeans and a bunch of t-shirts. Why would I need anything else?” Sarah: “I don’t need anything new. Except this. And this. And that.” Noah: “Uhh, what’s wrong with last year’s clothes?” Amy: “Okay, I really need this outfit and that outfit, but I hafta have earrings to match […]

no farmers here

As my tour of Knox County high schools took me through all kinds of rural East TN, I inevitably asked the principal guiding my tour about the “farms” that surrounded several of the schools. Some of them looked confused and flatly said that there were no farms. Others would snicker at my city-fied reaction to […]

cranking the naughty up to eleven

“Moooom! Evan is running around the house covered with soap.” “How did he get soap all over himself when the bathtub is dry?” “Weeeell, he took off his clothes and climbed in the sink and he squirted soap on his back and then he smeared it everywhere.” “He put soap on his own back?” “Yes.” […]

if students have higher expectations, then . . .

After several years of watching the school custodian smoking in the same area that students practice flag routines and drums, I have a proposal for him. I will personally coordinate a campaign to keep him stocked in chewing gum, if he will take smoke breaks inside his car, with all the windows rolled up tightly. […]

pretend camera

This picture is on page A-4 of today’s newspaper. Based on the, “can’t believe you didn’t take that with a real camera” response that I frequently get, I am naming my pretend camera Faux. Faux is my first girlfriend. We have a very serious relationship, but it is an open relationship. She is willing to […]

things I saw this past week

tons of wood shop, auto shop & beauty class equipment incoming freshmen who look like babies old schools built to last forever a new school that looks like it won’t withstand a strong wind a dozen floors being polished student teachers getting orientation a school built on top of a cave a lab that hasn’t […]

teenager Babel fish

I say: “It’s not just the rain that makes driving dangerous. It’s also oils that come out of the asphalt when it first starts to sprinkle.” They hear: “Mwah, mwah, mwah, you are a terrible driver, mwah, mwah, mwah.” I say: “When you are texting while doing something else, you are missing out on part […]

bees can make honey or they can sting

Last week, I started touring all of Knox County’s high schools and meeting the principals. It is the focus of my energies this week and my children are taking advantage of my time away to destroy the house. The end result is that I am scattered in too many directions until next week. Although I […]