Hairdresser: “Big plans today?”
Me: “No.”
Hairdresser: “Bigger plans tonight?”
Me: “Nope.”
Hairdresser: “Saving up for the weekend?”
Me: “No plans. None. Zero. Zip.”

< - I begin to wallow in self pity about my rapid descent to death when I sit home and do nothing. ->

Guy in chair next door taking to his stylist: “Sooo, what’s your hair color on your license? Ya know?”

< - Wishes I was home. ->