Since I don’t know where to go for leeches, I think I’ll try some empty pen medical care. While Doug’s can be stabbed anywhere to relieve his ample blood pressure, mine will be jammed in my sinus windows that are making my face throb. What? You never saw the magical curative powers of writing implements […]
To family/friends: “The pain is terrible.” To nurses: “I’m fine.” “I don’t want you to be frightened by all the tubes and wires, but . . . I’m peeing right now.” “That nurse has a funny accent. Does she have a green card?” “I don’t want the nurses to help me. That’s your mother’s job.” […]
Three quickies: 1. The people in this room aren’t just family and friends. Everyone in this room is a former or future CVICU patient. As someone who is conservatively a good 15 pounds heavier than they should be, I am willing to be annoying by saying that everyone in this room is or will have […]
Last week, when I assaulted the eardrums of everyone in the vicinity of Children’s Hospital with my plastic tree’s metal stand dragging the roof of the parking garage, it turned out to be the highlight of that day. Our destination was the children’s eye doctor who has taken care of my family since Tommy was […]
4:00 pm – Sarah enters the house, vomits and goes to bed. Her temperature is 101. “I stayed up too late last night. I’ll be fine after a quick nap. I have to go to a football game tomorrow night.” 10:00 pm – After a six hour nap, Sarah’s temperature is 102. “I think I […]
Late Thursday night, we got a phone call from *camp that two boys in Noah’s troop were sick and H1N1 was suspected. After a sleepless night, we got another phone call saying that the two sick scouts didn’t have H1N1’s trademark high fever and life returned to our version of normal. Saturday, the phone call […]