Before I walk in the grocery, I –
1. pull out only the coupons that I need and
2. throw away *expired coupons.

When I arrive at the checkout –
1. I do not go to a ten and under line if I have coupons and
2. I hand the clerk my coupons before they even begin to ring the order.

I feel like I am following basic coupon etiquette.

At the checkout –
1. The cashier calls the manager over to inspect the coupons. Is there a counterfeit coupon ring that creates the need for this?
2. The cashier scowls and pounds the coupon key so hard that I expect the key to break.
3. The woman in line behind me puts her hands on her hips and glares at me in the hope that I will make eye contact and apologize for having the audacity to use a coupon. Moms have peripheral vision and will notice your body language without ever looking directly at you.
4. The third person in line complained loudly about “people slowing everyone else down over a nickel.” I saved $12 with coupons today.

A few years ago, coupons were considered smart. Cashiers looked confused if you didn’t have coupons to use. That didn’t last. We are now back to coupons being something that annoys everyone except the coupon user.

* I am aware that there are people who ignore the expiration date and fight to use that expired coupon as if it were a challenge toward achieving coupon knighthood. I don’t do need to be coupon royalty. I just want to buy groceries without stressing the cashiers or other customers.