Another evening petting a stranger’s dog

“Do you want to go?”“No.”“You’ll have fun. You’re going.” “I’m a teacher. My partner is a principal.”“I’m a software engineer.”“Same.”“Same.”Everyone connects to a hivemind and simultaneously turn toward me: “What do YOU do?”“I’m just a mom.”<- stunned silence ->“How nice for you.” “That was fun. I don’t know why you didn’t want to go.”

Opinionated creatures

The husband put a motion sensor that makes Star trek noises at the bottom of our staircase. Reactions were mixed. One child picked it up and played with it while mumbling to himself. Another walked back and forth to set it off repeatedly while giggling. One of the children turned it off, hid it and […]

I hate talking about health issues

But I’m going to do it anyway. I once went to the Doctor with one eyelid swollen and painful. He looked at it from his wheelie stool on the other side of the exam room and then gave me a script for topical ointment. When I filled the script, it said in big letters, “Do […]

Creepy Reads

The first ‘sleep with the lights on’ book I read was Firestarter. It was handed to me by my father. “You’re too old for Nancy Drew. Read this.” I loved it and not just because it felt like I’d graduated to the world of adult books. For months after reading it I was glaring at […]

Senior Night

Without a dinosaur costume, I went with RBF for Senior Night on the high school football field in a monsoon.

Instead of remaking movies

While watching movies from my personal Halloween playlist, it occurs to me that I need to compile a list of movies that would be vastly improved by eliminating the soundtrack and replacing it with something that actually enhances the movie. I have two for the list already: Ghost Story Ladyhawke It’s not a big enough […]

Kinky lightbulb realization

I was this many years old when I realized that the literary/movie/TV trope about vampire bite victims/partners orgasming during bloodletting is a romanticised version of autoerotic asphyxiation.

Even better than flying toasters

When the husband wanders off for a distraction free phone call, I pause whatever we’re watching in out rare hour of together while awake and not too busy time. With the pause, comes the screensaver. I love the Roku pink and purple movie iconography screensaver that feels like being inside a rotating image lamp. They […]