My planner doesn’t fit.

I have been a dedicated MomAgenda Desktop user for the past two years. It fits my life perfectly. It has a row for each child and space for all of my activities. I just open the book and see everyone’s activities for the week. It all falls into place in my brain and the impossible becomes possible. In the back of the planner, I keep copies of everyone’s schedules, contact information for all the people in my life and lists. Lots and lots of lists. My planner has lists of blog topics I want to write about and lists of soundtracks to twitter on Fridays. There are lists of classmates, scout friends and team members. I have lists of coalitions and committees with goals and tasks for each. I made a special page with all my elected officials and space to make notes of the things they do and say all year. I glued pockets inside the back cover to store my Mommy cards and the cards I get from other people. Every year just before school began, I would spend a few evenings leisurely getting everything set-up in the planner and then it kept me organized. With five children in five different schools and a free-lance lifestyle, organization is the key to survival.

I even use the MomAgenda as a parenting crutch. When the children are sitting in the red wagon, perched at the top of our steep driveway, preparing to make a free fall plunge down the hill – I wave the Agenda at them. “I don’t have a hospital visit scheduled for today. Find something less dangerous to do please.” I use that technique with Doug, too.

Then, I found myself looking lustfully at the Mini-Daily size and smaller just sounded, well, cuter. I wrote the MomAgenda people twice and left comments on their blog, trying and get advice on the difference between the desktop and the daily, but they were too busy to answer me. The only difference I could see was that the Mini-Daily has a single page for each day and the book is smaller. Then, when the end of summer MomAgenda sale indicated that it was time to order my new planner, I saw the smaller size had a smaller cost and I made the investment in the still pricey, but irreplaceable planner in Mini-Daily instead of Desktop.

I feel like I bought the perfect shoe in the wrong size. It looks good, but it just doesn’t fit. It slips on my heel when I walk and leaves blisters on my toes. This shoe would be perfect for someone else, but not for me. The Mini-Daily is for the person who can open their planner in the morning and follow along with scheduled appointments. It is not for the person who is performing a Buster Berkely musical all over town in their old van. Carefully choreographed dance routines are not improv. I used up all the ink in one pen writing the children’s names on each page and I still haven’t finished getting their names in the planner. After two years with the Desktop size, the smaller size feels awkward and I write sloppy near the binding. The frustrating part, is the one day per page view. I need to see several days ahead at all times. If I don’t turn the page before I go to bed, I wake up, turn the page and feel hopelessly behind on the day. One day last week, Amy stayed after school for Girl Scouts, but I didn’t have the week’s view imprinted in my brain and I went into panic mode when she didn’t get off the bus. I don’t want to feel that again.

The Desktop was perfect. I just didn’t realize how perfect it was until I took it for granted and thought something else could be just as good. I only have to wear the lovely shoe in the wrong size until July. Of 2010.

Update: Even though I don’t deserve it, because it was entirely my mistake, MomAgenda is giving me a second chance. They are replacing my Mini-Daily with the Desktop. THANK YOU! I will feel so much saner when I have the Desktop safely within reach at all times. If you see me out and about, ask to see it and I will show you why I love it.