musical torture

Due to the unexpected absence of fender benders and traffic jams between home and the private school on the west edge of town, we arrived to basketball practice half an hour early. The school gym is extremely popular and arriving early means standing in the hallway waiting while boys endlessly try to jump high enough […]

white food

“What do you want for Thanksgiving dinner?” “Macaroni and cheese, deviled eggs and rolls.” “Is that all?” “Whipped cream.”

mornings + adolescence = misery

“Today was the worst day EVER. I was running late to the bus when I tried to use my pockets and figured out my pants were on backwards. I ran back home as fast as I could to fix them, but my shoelaces were a big knot and I couldn’t get them untied. I ran […]

weaponized pits

“Did you use deodorant?” “No, but last night I used enough to last all week.” “It really doesn’t work like that. You put deodorant on every morning like it’s your armour. Only instead of it protecting you, it saves the rest of the family from the stink bullets that shoot out of your armpits.” “Ewww. […]