He: “I have one day available before Thanksgiving company arrives. What would you like me to focus on getting done?” She: “The bathroom and kitchen need scrubbing. I’d like a driver for the grocery shopping so I don’t have to deal with the chaos of the grocery store parking lot.” He: “I was thinking of […]
“What do you want for Thanksgiving dinner?” “Macaroni and cheese, deviled eggs and rolls.” “Is that all?” “Whipped cream.”
Dad and Professor Teen went camping yesterday, so the two youngest and I huddled under blankets in our basement bedroom and watched Stardust. SuperTween declared it her new favorite movie. Since the answer to “what was your previous favorite” was The Hobbit, I suspect that whatever she watched most recently is her favorite. I’ll have […]
“Our Christmas grapefruit is here!” “How do you know that it’s grapefruit? It could be oranges or pears.” “Oranges and pears come from the grocery. Grapefruit comes in a box from UPS.” Maybe we should buy grapefruit more often.
All year long, I use email, SMS and social networks to communicate with people. I leave a lot of digital footprints, but nothing that would survive a terrible magnet attack. The exception is the card that I mail every Christmas season. Since I have read several anti-card posts this week, I am going to attempt […]
Doug: “What do you want for Mother’s Day?” Me: “A new splash screen.” Doug: “What do you want me to BUY you for Mother’s Day?” Me: “You can give me a new splash screen for my birthday.”
As a child, we were not allowed to wear green on St. Patrick’s Day. My father’s speech sounded something like, “That is not a Christian holiday and as Americans, we don’t support the IRA mwah-mwah-mwah-mwah.” All I heard was, “You’re gonna get pinched.” I should make a big deal about St. Patrick’s Day just to […]
On the first day of Christmas, my children gave to me, one lump on the head. On the second day of Christmas, my children gave to me, two different black eyes. On the third day of Christmas, my children gave to me, three hangnails. On the fourth day of Christmas, my children gave to me, […]
A. Evan moves the ornaments from the middle of the tree to the bottom of the tree. B. The dogs knock the ornaments to the floor. C. I move the ornaments from the floor to the middle of the tree. D. Repeat. All the day long.