“People outside of New York who have called 911 on Santa is a statistically tiny group. Maybe you should *list it on your college applications.” *She’ll probably go work on an Alaskan fishing boat to avoid my transition from endlessly saying “put it on your application” to “add it to your resume.”
Halloween > Thanksgiving > Christmas
On October first, the big off-brand Rubbermaid style buckets get dragged up from the basement so that the children can scatter bats and skulls and assorted Halloween decorations all over the house. When November arrives and it is time to pack it away, a few favorites will become part of the permanent house decor. We’re […]
The basement flooded when the washing machine went wonky. The crockpot died. The two children with a mystery virus are now walking nosebleeds. I think the youngest child has ringworm. Today was still the best day ever.
“I don’t care if it doesn’t make sense. When Alexa is on, the Silhouette cuts rhomboid. Listen to music with your headphones for the next hour.” “What do you think of this? Should it have a different design? Is the color wrong? Is this a good size?” “What is it?” “Nevermind. If you don’t understand […]
It’s the time of year when I bemoan the schools switching from sales of heavy weight gift wrap for fundraisers to stupid coupon books, coupon magazines, coupon cards and BUY OUR STUFF TO BUY MORE STUFF fundraisers. Since I can’t get wrapping paper delivered by school children, I have to buy a few rolls in […]
Since the children were small, we have decorated a lighted garland with 24 treat filled mittens to use as a countdown to Christmas morning. Every January, the children give their leftover candies to a sibling. This year, while the middle child explained to me what he currently does and does not like to eat, the […]
Every year, I ask the children to make wish lists. The wish lists vary greatly in usefulness when holiday shopping. They are also priceless captures of each child’s personality at that moment in time. The 10-y-o’s list is a compilation of whatever he is currently playing with and any commercial he has recently seen. The […]