If you ignore an inbox long enough,
Then it becomes an outbox.

IF you are licking your arms today,
THEN you got too much sun yesterday.

If, one of the children has a project due the next day,
Then, I will be awake at midnight the night before, adding one last thing and correcting some unforseen problem.

If Noah doesn’t score well on this project,
Then I may sit and cry.

If, your children’s car toy is medical waste,
Then, you’ve spent too much time at hospitals lately.

If the top rack is full and the bottom rack is empty,

then, we drink too much.
OR ELSE
then, our dishwasher has a top rack and an “extra top rack”.

updated for all the programming geeks I love

If you can identify the barely digested contents of the diaper,
Then the baby isn’t ready to eat that particular food.