For the second time today I heard Amy hiding on the other side of the fridge, crunching on dog food. As I walked in the kitchen to confront her, she tossed the container of dog food over her shoulder (spilling the contents everywhere) while putting her hands behind her back and making her innocent face. I started cleaning up dog food and heard a spray noise. I don’t know if the dog food was some giant ruse to distract me, but Amy was in the living room windexing the houseplants. I stood there calmly while she screamed in anger at having the windex taken away. Inside, I was screaming too.