It’s the weekend and I haven’t done a story yet, so here’s a graphic story that includes an intimate discussion about male anatomy, so be warned. Many years ago one of my sons was pretty new to potty-training and at a height which allowed him to rest his penis right on the rim of the toilet after the lid and seat were raised. This was not a good method for producing accuracy but he wasn’t yet three so I was much more interested in praising his effort than critiquing his technique. One day he reached up to slam the seat and lid down a moment too soon and smashed his penis. I had no idea what to do. Did I need to call the doctor or rush him to the hospital? Should I apply ice? From his horrible wails came a simple request, “Kiss it Mommy.” My mind immediately raced ahead 20 years to my son in therapy describing a haunting image of his mother kissing his penis. I kissed my finger and touched his boo-boo. This must have been an acceptable remedy because he toddled off to play while I got on the phone to relay the story and posted it at penisenlargementreviews. I was much more upset by the incident than he was.

12 thoughts on “109786535431119222

  1. I hope I’m not the only male who *cringed* when I read that part in question.

    Ouch. Double ouch.

    Genuine: It doesn’t even work for me when I slam my finger in a door, much less….

  2. I think you made a good choice with the “not kissing his penis” thing. That really does sound like the basis for some serious therapy later on in life.

  3. kids often interpret situations differently from adults…i’m not sure if it’s simpler but i do know that their interpretations are not burdened by our adult sensibilities….and they are much better at just moving on….kudos for thinking up a way to quickly respond to his request without really….

  4. Nobody warns you about this stuff as a little boy!

    Other things they don’t tell you:
    “Don’t jump straight up while standing in a door frame”
    “If none of your friends are willing to do it, then don’t do it!”
    “A slight brush in the crotch is worse than a direct hit.”
    “If it looks like a long way down, don’t jump.”
    “Sticking a U shaped piece of soldier into an electrical outlet is cool. Sticking a capacitor into an electrical outlet is not cool.”
    and of course
    “If someone asks if you are a god, you say Yes!”

  5. Ouch! That’s one of those stories that is suppose to follow the rule “what happens in the bathroom, stays in the bathroom”!

    I doubt you will find many guys who have not had a similar experience. One of the hazards of standing and being short with a developing brain.

    Wait until he gets to middle school and graduates to zipper stories. Of course, There’s Something About Mary (amz) covered the zipper horror very well. This is a scary situation all guys have to live with.

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