Random thoughts:
Not only is the tree getting set-up next Halloween, next year we are decorating it with all the orphaned socks in this house.
Amy is carrying around a dried glue stick and occasionally applying it to her underarms.
Not even the promise of sex inspires Doug to work on the tree.
Yesterday I woke up to a yucky nosebleed (mine, not Noah’s). Today I woke up to Molly tossing her empty food bowl up in the air and letting it clatter on the floor over and over. I’m not sure which is a more annoying way to wake up.
After I complained heavily about the bad smell in the kitchen Doug finally remembered a mousetrap under the cabinets. He put the trap and its’ victim in the kitchen trashcan. Umm, how does this help?
“Man…sounds like you and I could be twins. Really.”
Did the ante on the lights just get up’d? I’ll see your raise, double the number of light strings (since we are talking twins now) and raise you a Barry with a video camera!
Not even the promise of sex inspires Doug to work on the tree.
You know, I was going to post something along the lines of how you could promise sex to other people and they’d put up your tree, but that would be inappropriate on a family blog.
But that said, sorry Doug – you’re obviously not reading the husband manual which plainly reads in Chapter II, page 36 (paragraph 3):
“When your wife offers to trade sex for a household chore, you take her up on the offer. There can be no delaying this transaction, as such offers are seldom rendered, and one can never know if it will ever be offered again.”
C’mon, man. Do it for the rest of us…
But you love them, right?
How else would there be a new one on his/her way in May?
Domestic Psychology is an apt name, since you obviously have a thing for crazy!!
J
He’s really livin on the edge these days, aint’ he? LOl
Just leave your tree up when it gets done.
Man…sounds like you and I could be twins. Really.
I’m with you – we should start a campaign to move Christmas to NEXT Halloween. I could probably be ready by then.
re: mouse. She did forget to mention that I immediately took the trash out.
The next time you joke about “two women” I’m going to start talking about your skanky ex’s behavior.
Wait – I gotta get that battery fixed and invest in some lighting…
Do I get DVD rights?
Well, is the gluestick scented? Sometimes they smell like grape or something, so maybe that was her thinking? lol
As for the rest…you are on your own!