I blingo-ed midlife crisis and found what I already know. Men cheat with 20-somethings whose bodies haven’t been altered by pregnancy while women try to accept the ‘meaning of life’. Okay, maybe I paraphrased just a teeny bit but it’s vaguely accurate. In the past week, I’ve made mental lists of all the things I never did (cartwheel, ride a limo, wear a formal, travel, etc.) and thought about being the oldest of my generation (my middle brother and his wife, my baby brother and his wife, Doug, his brother and wife, his sister and her tuba). All very depressing. I would be long ago incinerated or in a block of ice on Logan’s Run. Sigh. I want to buy and eat an entire box of Little Debbie nutty bars. I’d have to raid the change jar first though.