Most serious conversations happen at night when Doug and I are the only people listening. Last Saturday, one of the conversations leaked over to the grandparents’ house and my parents added their two cents. Since my father has some hearing loss that he refuses to acknowledge, everyone in the family knows that mumbles and whispers go unheard.

My father: “I know that ALL of my children will want to keep my ashes.”
Me: “No way. I will sneak you into Neyland Stadium and dump you there.”
My father: “Why? It’s Astroturf.”
My mother mumbling in the other room: “If you die first I’m putting you in Cades Cove. You never took me there when you were alive so I’m putting you there for eternity.”