I don’t want to sweep the floors, so I’m going to stall and share some of the search terms that brought people to my little mommy blog.

1. c.p.a. +memphis+psychology – Yes, I used to work for a CPA firm in Memphis. They needed a psychiatrist on staff every April. No, they needed an alcohol counselor.

2. 2nd birthday quotes – It was probably “no.” Repeated a few hundred times.

3. youtube giving birth in a car people – Instead of standing around recording it, maybe you should have driven to medical help.

4. psychology, jaws theme – Yes, my children have been classically conditioned to run screaming whenever they hear the Jaws theme.

5. what happened the day of october 9 2007 – Laundry, dishes, the usual.

6. can i put laundry soap in the dishwasher – No. Don’t do it.

7.DEODORANT ACTUALLY SPARKLES – Send some of that to Sarah. She’ll like it.