Granny: “I have to get some sleep tonight. I’ll be up late watching the Cubs tomorrow night.” Me: “Since when do you like baseball?” Granny “I have to watch it for him.” He spent his entire life believing in the Cubs. All those decades of waiting and now that he’s gone…
Every extended family gathering: “You won’t die from an allergic reaction if you eat an onion, will you?” “No. I will vomit though.” “Great! You can eat around them.” Followed by: “Hey Cathy, want more onions? Ha-Ha!” And: “I put extra onions it, just for Cathy. Hee-Hee!” Making me physically ill is great and hilarious… […]
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I had to drive StacheMan to the Grands so that he could housesit for them. Driving to the Grands is something that I do on auto pilot. The same goes for the children’s schools, the grocery and the bullseye store. Routine routes are stressless. I sang to the songs on the radio while StacheMan monologued […]
What kind of awkward will we experience on Saturday? Will it be the uncomfortable awkward silence of words that people fear to speak? Will it be the awkward tension of anxiety about the unknown and unexplainable? Will it be the awkward absurdity of comparing noses and foreheads? All I know is that I will be […]
Children on the spectrum are brilliant imitators of the people around them. It’s a technique that helps them fill in the blind spots caused by Autism. It’s also one of the best reasons for mainstreaming with their NT peers. Aspie Caveman has always had a very close relationship with his grandfather. When Tommy was very […]
Long ago and not very far away, two Phi Sigma Kappas with a long history of rivalry decided that the winner of a coin toss would be the one who got to ask out the sorority girl from California. The winner of the toss was my father and obviously, the girl was my mother. The […]
As my father groggily fought his way out of the sedation from the CABG surgery, he repeatedly asked which leg the doctor amputated. Everyone reassured him that his legs were still attached, but even as he became more lucid, he remained convinced that he was going to lose a leg. “It was just a dream. […]
To family/friends: “The pain is terrible.” To nurses: “I’m fine.” “I don’t want you to be frightened by all the tubes and wires, but . . . I’m peeing right now.” “That nurse has a funny accent. Does she have a green card?” “I don’t want the nurses to help me. That’s your mother’s job.” […]
Over the weekend, we took the youngest children to a place in middle TN that was an integral part of my childhood. A place that I haven’t visited in over a decade and an area that I told goodbye during my grandmother’s funeral. A place where time stands still. Oh, wait. The trees are taller […]