Guard Teen planned to spend the Thanksgiving holidays complaining to her older sister about not bringing a rescue puppy home from her Texas flood cleanup. Instead of a puppy, Unemployed Artist brought home a boyfriend. He was so charming and good natured that Guard Teen forgot to torture her sibling. I didn’t remind her either.
He: “Why are you frowning?” She: “I fell down the driveway and borked my knee.” What she wanted him to say: Sorry about your knee. What he said instead: “Do you want me to see if they can put better soles on your shoes?” How she responded: “I’d like them dropped in an active volcano.” […]
What kind of awkward will we experience on Saturday? Will it be the uncomfortable awkward silence of words that people fear to speak? Will it be the awkward tension of anxiety about the unknown and unexplainable? Will it be the awkward absurdity of comparing noses and foreheads? All I know is that I will be […]
Baccalaureate episode: Mom, Tween and Graduating Teen raced off to the store to buy a replacement for Graduating Teen’s conveniently “missing” tie and a black slip for the Mom who could never remember that her only slip was white until she was in the process of getting dressed. Mom and Graduating Teen met at the […]
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Dad and Professor Teen went camping yesterday, so the two youngest and I huddled under blankets in our basement bedroom and watched Stardust. SuperTween declared it her new favorite movie. Since the answer to “what was your previous favorite” was The Hobbit, I suspect that whatever she watched most recently is her favorite. I’ll have […]
In an attempt to create a grocery list for Thursday, I have been looking through cookbooks and my pile of hand written family recipes. In an even greater attempt to procrastinate from actually making progress on Thanksgiving plans, I have been geezing. Remembering. Pondering. While she was a woman of many talents, cooking was my […]
When my father had CABG surgery, every single clipboard attached to his bed had “no family medical history” written in letters so large that it was impossible not to see it. It didn’t stop doctors, nurses and social workers from asking him repeatedly why he had no family medical history. Among the many, many revelations […]
Long ago and not very far away, two Phi Sigma Kappas with a long history of rivalry decided that the winner of a coin toss would be the one who got to ask out the sorority girl from California. The winner of the toss was my father and obviously, the girl was my mother. The […]