Squirrel fell off roof.
He got up and ran away.
Bipolar squirrel.

Dancing in the street,
the suicidal squirrel.
Why do you tempt fate?

All summer I see
roadkill with tails still moving.
Cars are worse than cats.

I like Chip ‘n Dale.
You are not bushy tailed rats.
Please stay in the trees.

First bug bites this year.
I scratched them until they bled.
Same thing every year.

Where are Evan’s shoes?
His funny little red crocs
That he loved so much.

He wore them to bed.
They were always on his feet.
Now his feet are bare.

Big sister found them.
Evan is happy again.
He needs a spare pair.

Molly ate our hose.
Bite and chew and shake and toss,
No more slip ‘n slide.

Lonely solo sneeze
You should be half of a pair
Greedy triple sneeze

Peg Bundy at night.
Roseanne when I am at home.
I wish I was Claire.

Wrappers on the floor.
They know where the trash cans are.
I would not litter.

Mom got no candy.
Sticky children will not sleep.
They know Mom’s a thief.

Betty Spaghetty
body parts scattered on floor.
Looks like a crime scene.