Dr. C: “Well, at least the bone chip isn’t floating in the wrong place.”
Me: “Um, yay?”

Nurse: “I think a broken toe has to be one of the most uncomfortable things ever.”
Me: “Ummm.” (thinking about childbirth, my mother’s knee replacements, my grandfather’s cancer, etc.)
Nurse: “Well, I guess there are things that are worse, but nothing hurts like a toe.”

Doug: “What did the doctor say?”
Me: “He said to stay off my foot.”
Doug: “Bwa-ha-ha-ha!”

Noah: “What did the doctor say?”
Me: “He said my big toe is broken.”
Noah: “Again? There’s always something wrong with your feet.”