Two pictures taken with the same camera, but by two different photographers. The quality is equal, but the focus is completely different. Near-sighted pictures and far-sighted pictures in a set, create a full story. With just one, the story is incomplete. I worry about feelings while Doug worries about things on a much bigger scale, like money. I make sure there are birthday cakes and gifts while Doug keeps the electric bill paid. We are yin and yang. We are two sides of the same coin. We function best, together.
A million years ago, someone told me that good marriages come in three styles. “V” couples (imagine each line on the V is a person looking away) lead completely independent lives and would go on functioning just fine if something happened to the relationship. We know couples like his and the funny thing about “V” couples is that they don’t even realize how little their spouse is connected to them. “H” couples (imagine two people standing and holding hands in the shape of an H) lead semi-independent lives, but they are very connected and many of their interests and activities are together. They would still function apart, but there would be a noticeable missing piece. “H” couples are usually both career people. “A” couples (imagine two people leaning on each other and holding hands) depend on each other to function. Without each other, they would fall down. Their lives are too intertwined to be distinguishable. Doug and I are somewhere between “H” and “A”. The healthiest style is obviously an “H” couple, but truthfully, I think Doug and I just a little too crazy to be that functional at this point in our lives. Plus, there’s the problem of just one car. Kidding.