I don’t care if I pronounce character names correctly in my head. Sometimes I’m guessing correctly. If I think Myfanwy looks like Tiffany with an M, that’s what I’ll think when I read it. All the character names have a X or a Q randomly stuck in a series of letters? I’m making a guess and sticking to it the entire series. I do actually feel guilty when the story takes place in Scotland or Ireland and I know the names are based on something real, but if it’s attached to a mythological species, the pretend character can just as easily be a JoAnne.

Those maps that were the biggest expense in your book production? I acknowledge their existence and move on. I’m sorry you had to deal with an artist who expresses feelings instead of repressing them into ulcers like a regular person. That map is still not getting my attention. I’m sure it took two barking dog conference calls to decide if the coastline should be straight or pocked with inlets. Other readers will buy the poster sized map to make up for my indifference. It’s almost certainly connected to my absence of a sense of direction. I can’t even navigate subways. “I couldn’t figure out how to get to the other side of the platform and now I’m on Wall Street.” I’m far more interested in the actual journey via ley lines/dragon back/enchanted car/horse who hates shifters, than the route they took.

What I do love is a basic family tree. I will wade into fan forums for a simply drawn explanation of how the characters are related. Is there a Lorax for literary family trees?