Category: Doug

just like daddy

First night: “Why can’t I sleep nekkid like Daddy does sometimes?” Second night: “Can I just wear jammie bottoms and no shirt like Daddy wears?” Third night: “Doug, I need you to start wearing panties and a gown at night.”

Rule of three – home improvement version

From the rule book: Home repair and improvements require at least three trips to the hardware store to replace broken/lost tools and/or supplies. Ex. – “I can’t find the basin wrench, so I have to go back to Home Depot. The water is turned off.”

bad foreplay

In no particular order and requiring no explanations, five actions that warrant the bad foreplay card: 1. punching partner in the face 2. noxious gas from any orifice 3. “I like this one best, because it’s bigger.” 4. “One of the animals threw up in the other room, but we’ll clean it up afterwards.” 5. […]

middle-aged Saturday

Him: “What do you want to do today?” Her: “We could work in the garage or we could start thinning out the junk in our closet. After that, Evan needs new shoes.” Him: “I was thinking it’s a good day to plant grass in the yard. We have some spots that are full sun and […]

Today’s euphemism: adult time

Our beaker is extremely full. Adult time is so important that it should be a large rock. In reality, it is somewhere between gravel and sand. The boulders that take top priority don’t just make time something that we have to use whenever it is available, they complicate space availability. In other words, if we […]

pretend this is a real post

In lieu of an actual post, a quick update that may or may not hint at future post topics. Tommy – Every semester is a fog of not knowing until final grades appear, so we are stuck in a holding pattern. Sarah – For an assortment of reasons, including some that she won’t admit, Sarah […]

praw-leans, pra-lynes

The grandparents brought a box of pitch perfect pralines back from their trip to New Orleans. It took less than five minutes to recognize that Doug has a devotion to pralines that I reserve for dark chocolate. Doug: “I can’t decide if I want to eat a praline or a bowl of ice cream.” Me: […]