One of those posts which annoys some and bores others

Mercury in Dental Fillings Safe for School-Age Children

Doug and I facilitate a support group for family and friends of people with Aspergers. Sometimes, the meetings are wonderful. Other times, I just feel like getting up and walking out. Those are the meetings where I sit silently and bite my tongue. They are the meetings that are always dominated by the parents of young children with Aspergers. They are meetings devoted to tales of having all their children’s fillings replaced and taking them for blood chelation therapy to remove the metals. They are about alternative-care providers who evaluate their children for metals based on absolutely nothing scientific. They are about discussing vitamin therapies and special diets. The parents are angry at the government for causing their children to be on the Autistic spectrum and they are determined to cure their children.

I admit that there were dark, tantrum-filled days when I wanted a child who reacted somewhat predictably to his environment and responded appropriately to discipline and rewards. However, I never, ever felt desperate enough to buy magic beans or endanger my child’s health. I have come to a very happy place in my journey as the parent of a teen with Aspergers. I like my son just as he is right now. He has an unique personality, but that is WHO he is and not WHAT he is. His personality needs no “cure”. My only long-term worries for him are that he find other people who see him as I do. I don’t want him to feel alone and isolated because he is different. I want him to find his niche and be a positive contribution to society, with the sense of belonging that comes from interacting with others.

2 thoughts on “One of those posts which annoys some and bores others

  1. Wow, this is a toughy. On one side of things, I understand, because as a parent you don’t want to leave any stone unturned that may benefit your child.

    But on the other side there are limits. And it worries me, particularly when you find that parent that wants a “normal child,” not necessarily because they want what is best for the child, but because they fear how it reflects on “them” and how society sees “them” for having a child with such “problems”. These are the people that need a slap in the head and a reminder that it is not all about “them.”

    (It is actually usually pretty easy to tell one from the other, because the first type of parent is usually armed with studies or facts, whereas the second is usually armed with a “wing and a prayer”)

  2. I agree with you completely. I am proud of who my son is and I would not want him to turn into some “normal”, different child because that would not be my son. Plus I have a hard time believing that he got his Aspergers from his fillings or his vaccinations or the fish I had been eating while pregnant with him. (yes somebody actually did ask me about the fish.) It is to a very large extent hereditary. Maybe finding a cure for Aspergers is these parents’ special area of interest, if you know what I mean 😉

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