Doug vs. squirrels

It’s time for round three of Doug’s war against the squirrels. A quick recap of previous battles of wit had Doug nailing a board over the entrance the squirrels chewed into the attic which the squirrels promptly chewed through again. Doug-0 squirrels-1 Doug then tossed an entire box of mothballs all over the attic, which chased squirrels AND humans out of the house for days. Let’s call that round a tie. Now, the squirrels are in the attic AND the wood stove. While part of me would like to just give them food and live in harmony with them, another part of me wants to borrow one of my father’s guns, nail the little buggers and hang their corpses from the eaves as a warning to future house-hunting squirrels.

6 thoughts on “Doug vs. squirrels

  1. I should have checked in on Doug First…

    Update for clarity’s sake: For the record, a Fisher wood stove will comfortably house two crazy squirrels and contains a fist full of fireworks very well but will not keep the smell of gun powder from permeating throughout the house.

    Squirrels – 2 Doug – 0 Ties – 1

  2. From a friend’s bitter and and drawn out war against the little furry buggers, I can tell you the only way to win is to remove trees from the proximity of the house.

  3. I’m having flashbacks to “Caddyshack” and Bill Murray as Carl Spackler …

    I have to laugh, because I’ve outsmarted even myself. My enemy, my foe, is an animal. In order to conquer the animal, I have to learn to think like an animal. And, whenever possible, to look like one. I’ve gotta get inside this guy’s pelt and crawl around for a few days.

  4. Lissa Kay has described the situation perfectly. Latte Man is cracking me up (“bat entrees”…”Squirrels – 2”). Stormare is welcome to come over and collect some do-it-yourself firewood anytime. We live on an almost completely wooded lot, which is why the power goes out during most big storms.

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