“My mother is being completely unreasonable. She said that I had to find my own money to pay for the tattoo I want. So, I’m gonna use her credit card to…hang on…Hello? Oh? Okay, that sounds great. Alright. I will. Buh-bye. (turns back to friend) My mother didn’t get all my laundry finished over the weekend, so she’s shipping it to me. Anyway, I’m gonna buy some stuff and return it for cash to pay for the tattoo.”

The “world revolves around me” college students are back in town.