Today was overscheduled, with children’s activities overlapping. I needed to get dressed and get out the door quickly this morning. As I sat down to dry my hair, I ran out of my styling product. Specifically, it got so low that nothing would squirt out the pump dispenser. As I always do with shampoo, dish soap and similar products, I unscrewed the cap, removed the dispensing mechanism and turned the bottle upside down to collect whatever remained on the sides and bottom of the container. This is the point where the husband helpfully asked why I didn’t go buy a replacement styling creme. “I already have a fresh one under the bathroom sink. I’m not wasting all the product still in the bottle just because it’s too low for the pump to work.”

In one glorp, a glob of hair product piled on my freshly washed hair. I tried to spread it out evenly in my hair and cranked up the hair dryer. I dried my hair. I dried my hair longer. I dried my hair for twice the usual time and I STILL had one moist, shiny section of hair. Running ridiculously late, I gave up and decided to let the overly producted hair dry on its own.

More than twelve hours, one unexpected early school day closure, a cancelled band performance and assorted drama later, I have a shiny, damp section of hair on the back of my head. I think tomorrow is a good day to wear a bandana or hat all day. No clown wigs, though. Clowning is an arrestable offense these days.