I pick my battles

I like Barry. He reminds me of my youngest brother. Just like I sometimes do with my baby brother, I’m going to have to agree to disagree with Barry on the topic of ‘picking your battles‘. I have five very different children. Each of them is treated just as differently. However, none of them is disciplined or trained the same way that we trained our very well-behaved German Shepherd. They are unique individuals who are being raised to think for themselves and learn from their mistakes. I think that Doug and I are very strict about expecting honesty and respect from our children. In other areas we are much more liberal than other parents. We know that. The most harmless example I can think of is hair. While they aren’t allowed freedom with permanent things like tattoos or piercings, they are allowed to do what they want with their hair. I may think it’s stupid when Sarah combs her hair over one eye, but that is a battle I won’t fight. The grandparents all hate Tommy’s long hair but that is not a battle we will fight with Tommy OR the grandparents. Doug will tell you that I am a bit over-sensitive about clothing. While we both agree that underwear can’t show and t-shirts should not be crude or rude, I expect clothing to be clean and matching. Doug thinks color and style clashes should be ignored but he lets me have my hang-ups. I won’t even begin to explain the importance of picking battles with a special needs child. I pick my battles. Do you pick your battles?

3 thoughts on “I pick my battles

  1. I have to, lest I be overwhelmed by the insurgency.

    We have different issues, because our kids are younger, but to say my kids are “very different” from each other would be an understatement. One thing I hear a lot is “that’s not fair!”

  2. I fully agree. (With the one breif exception from when my daughter decided to try to be her own stylist and cut her own hair).

    Other than stressing what is appropriate (My daughter would wear dresses everywhere if she could – but wearing one while rock climbing, or other such activity I prefer to guide her) she gets to choose what she wears.

    Fortunately, for us we have had little to complain about even if we didn’t choose to pick the battles we have.

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