the hard part of parenting

Katie is letting parents confess to the parts of parenting that they secretly wish they didn’t have to do. Although I agree with her on her first one and even add that maybe that’s why I always hated starting my babies on solid foods, something else is bugging me right now. As a teenager, I was big on non-conformity and the ignorance of adhering to rules instead of thinking independently. So, it causes me great pain to have to tell Sarah “no” just because of a rule I established. Let me be more specific. Sarah is a social butterfly. She would like to be doing something with friends every minute of every day. I’m fine with that. It’s better than the alternative. What I had to draw the line on, was her expecting us to drop and run anytime she needed transportation for herself or her friends. I think that allowing that kind of behavior is the foundation for selfishness as an older teen and young adult. So, the rule was created (without Sarah’s input) that any activities had to be on Mom’s calendar the night before. Now, I find myself having to enforce this rule at times when I feasibly could drive her somewhere but won’t just because she didn’t plan it the night before. I feel like an ogre even though I know in my heart that long-term this is the right way to handle Sarah. So, rules for the sake of rules is the part of parenting that I hate.

One thought on “the hard part of parenting

  1. I’ll have to go check out that post. But what you’re doing is important. We have to stick to our guns, no matter how hard it is. I have friends tell me not to threaten what I won’t follow up on (when I say that I’ll take Kasia out of TKD) – but what they don’t realize is that I WILL do it. It’s a big part of her life now and the only thing that’d work as a punishment.

    And Santa’s watching is not an idle threat. He is. *wink*

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