Month: February 2009

Why is it so cold in here?

Our car allows the driver and passenger to control the temperature of their own air vents. Invariably, Doug has his vents blowing a/c and I have my vents cranking out the heat. I’m surprised we don’t create storm fronts in our car. I am always cold and Doug is always complaining that the house, the […]

how to buy a library book

1. Insist that you want applesauce in your school lunch. 2. In the school cafeteria, take one nibble of applesauce. 3. Return open applesauce to backpack. 4. Throw backpack around several times. 5. Let mom open backpack to discover applesauce in every nook and cranny of backpack, school work, folders AND a school library book. […]

peanut butter

Every time I walk past the shelves of food in our kitchen, I give the jar of peanut butter the evil eye. Bad guys can’t resist laughing at the evil eye. The peanut butter always looks back at me with a big clown smile. I just can’t decide if it’s a Bozo smile or a […]

further proof the boy is feral

We are still failing all efforts to potty train Evan. Every single person in the family is participating in the encouragement and every single person is participating in the hazmat cleanup. How is it that this little person can’t make it to the bathroom, but CAN make it to the play kitchen sink? Repeatedly. Why […]

TMI warning

If the contents of my nose don’t become less green and my face doesn’t stop hurting, I might actually consider a visit to the doctor. Maybe. Really disgusting update: It is no longer just green. Now it is blood streaked. Let’s pretend that means it’s getting better.

snakes <3 comic books

Heroes returns tonight and although this pleases me, I think that our snake, Bahamut is thrilled. Snakes like comic book television. Well, I think they do anyway. Maybe he just likes Heroes because I get him out of his aquarium and let him watch Heroes with me. Either way, it’s a good night.

do I have a fever?

When I feel sick, I whine a lot and ask Doug to feel my forehead. “Do I feel hot?” His answer is always no. I whimper and explain that my temperature is below normal when I’m healthy, so a normal forehead must mean I have a fever. Doug never, ever buys into my sickness induced […]