from the cutting room floor

Two short anecdotes that didn’t make the cut: In preparation for my youngest child’s first musical performance, we practiced songs daily. The day of the event, we sat near the front of the auditorium and waited. Our child’s turn on the stage was spent staring at his feet, rocking on his toes, wandering from his […]

redecorating the tree

A. Evan moves the ornaments from the middle of the tree to the bottom of the tree. B. The dogs knock the ornaments to the floor. C. I move the ornaments from the floor to the middle of the tree. D. Repeat. All the day long.

yardwork

Doug spent yesterday and today blowing leaves. He blew leaves off the roof. He blew leaves off the driveway. He blew leaves from the front yard. He blew leaves from the back yard. He took the thick blanket of leaves that covered every inch of our house and yard and blew the leaves into giant […]

water critics

Besides the ridiculous habit of someone having to sit beside Evan until he falls asleep every night, both Evan and his sister demand a cup of water at their bedside. I’m sure it’s because I allowed them to nurse themselves to sleep or something else I did wrong, but as with many things, this is […]

bedtime routines

When Evan graduated out of the crib, he made it abundantly clear that without a cage to contain him, he was not going to remain still long enough to fall asleep. Every night since then, someone gets in the teeny bed with Evan and snuggles up next to him until Evan is asleep. Usually, the […]

just being contrary

Dad: “Quesadillas are ready!” Me: “Who wants a cheese triangle?” Evan: “I want a cheese RECTANGLE.” Me: “No rectangles today.” Evan: “I guess I’ll take a cheese circle.”

this wasn’t in the manual

“Look, Mom! I found two balls in here.” “Why don’t you build something with your Legos?” “I want to get these out.” “Those don’t come out. Now stop doing that before you break something.” “I’m gonna pee them out.” “I really wish you wouldn’t.”

boy post updates

I gave Tommy some suggestions on making his politics paper’s topic more substantial. He went to his grandfather’s and they “discussed” the paper. Tommy called me and whined for an hour that he can’t write a paper without offending someone. I told him that it doesn’t matter what his topic is as long as he […]

Dear future me,

I am writing this from ten years in the past, when Evan was only four. If future me is having a chat about Evan with his therapist or arresting officer, this date might be important. This is the date when I, err you, found all of Evan’s sisters’ underwear stashed on Evan’s little, crib-sized bed. […]