Me: “Tell me about your day.”
Noah: “Well, it was a pretty regular day.”
Me: “Tell me one thing that you did.”
Noah: “I went to chess club.”
Me: “Tell me one thing about your day that was DIFFERENT.”
Noah: “A mean kid mooned me in the hallway.”
Amy: “What’s mooned?”
*Me: “Ask your father.”

*I was tired. Besides, I think that since I answered the “where do babies” come from question, I’m allowed to skip a few explanations. It took place in Babies ‘R Us with several young, pregnant women within earshot and it went something like this:
Noah: “How do people get babies?”
Dad: “Well, when people love each other they sometimes decide to make a new life together.”
Noah: “No, I mean HOW do they get the baby?”
Mom: sensing that Dad is about to answer more than Noah is asking, “When people have sex together it sometimes makes a baby.”
Noah: “Well, then you must have a LOT of sex.”
Mom: “I guess so.”
Noah: “Ok.”
Dad – Laughing so hard he has tears coming out of his eyes, “Isn’t he great?”