Three-year-olds are a wonderful blend of toddler and child. Still baby enough to snuggle in your arms and fall asleep, but big enough to absorb everything the older children say and do. They will also lie about the melted chocolate on their hands and face (“Amy ate it.”) and be tactlessly honest in front of strangers (“That man is bald!”). Evan’s new ‘trick’ is pointing at brown skinned teen boys and young adults while announcing, “He’s a cool dude.” The very first time he did this, I reacted like a deer in headlights. Shock and denial. “Do we spend too much time at home?” Pain and guilt. “Should we move someplace more culturally diverse than Knoxville?” Anger and bargaining. “Children will say anything.” Depression. “Evan will spend his adolescence searching for a cool he can’t obtain.” Shift in perception. “Evan doesn’t just categorize people as adult or child.” Processing. “Evan is mature enough to tell me his likes and dislikes.” Finally, there was acceptance. “At least he doesn’t point at people and identify them by size like his sister did.”
Funny how Kubler-Ross’s stages of grief apply to embarassment too! There’s nothing wrong with being a cool dude.